The Problem With Doubt

Doubt seems to me to be one of the most crippling states of mind a writer can fall into. By doubt, I mean a feeling that whatever one's doing is either pointless or will otherwise fail.

As writers, we are told early on that in a social networking world, we can't express doubt even if we're feeling it because it looks unprofessional and gives readers a reason to believe that the writer must not be selling any books or has lost his/her touch. So, when we feel doubt, we have to keep it to ourselves.

Doubt seems to lead to more doubt. I don't know if doubting becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, or whether there's something psychic going on that sends out "weakness vibes" telling things that weren't going wrong to suddenly go wrong. Or, perhaps our view of things changes when we're feeling doubt and things suddenly look worse than they are.

How to Fix It

As a man, I'm expected to ask "how does one fix it?" Frankly, I've been writing long enough to know that "fixing it" isn't a train of thought that leads down the road to non-doubt. In many ways, I think we have to trick doubt or trick ourselves.

While we're doubting, we can "prove" our doubt is rational by listing things that aren't going well: The last book sold poorly, an article or short story has been rejected, publishers won't look at unsolicited manuscripts and neither will agents so why bother, or one just doesn't seem to have the "gift of gab" that draws friends and relationships online or at talks and book signings.

Such lists can be endless. And, truth be told, if we're going to persist in making them, perhaps each item we include should be examined logically. Perhaps the last book didn't sell because we skimped on promotion, put it into the wrong genre, or picked a book cover that didn't work. Maybe our articles are being rejected because we're sending them in blind rather than querying the editor to see what s/he wants. There are legitimate reasons why things don't always work.

Moving On

If  we're already doing everything we know to do--and seriously believe we're in the right business--then I think we have to distract ourselves from our doubt long enough to feel like trying again. Sure, there will always be stories about people who self-published their books and sold them out of their cars until some friend of a big New York agent happened to see a copy and sent it to the important people s/he knew and suddenly HarperCollins bought the book for $1,000,000.

Seeing the writing world as hopeless every time we read stories like that certainly creates doubt because the implication is that no matter how hard you work, you won't succeed without some magical event. But, even if that's true (and I don't think so) we write because of some reason--we like asking what if, we like telling stories, we like juggling the stuff of our imagination.

Whatever that reason is, getting back to it is the best way to counteract doubt. Personally, I've tricked myself out of feelings of doubt by distracting myself with a great novel, a compelling movie, or in catching up with the zines and magazines that I've let pile up. Some people are able to get rid of doubt by focusing on physical activity such as washing the car, mowing the yard, or going to a hike.

When the distraction is strong enough, it's almost (for me) a magical moment. It pulls me far enough away from doubt that rather than feeling hopeless, I'm thinking of story ideas again or suddenly coming up with some new posts for my blogs. At some point in the process, doubt vanishes.

What about you? We know that some famous singers get stage fright; that baseball pitchers employ all kinds of rituals to keep from clutching up and worrying about the pitches they're about to throw; that one thing or another thing gets a writer into the groove rather than worrying about where the groove is.

The Mind Killer

In the novel Dune, the Bene Gesserit had a litany against fear: "I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."

Perhaps we need no go that far to dispel doubt, though it can be a mind killer for a writer. If logic can't cast it out, than perhaps tricks will work or a stiff drink. I cannot write when I doubt and so I do everything I can to keep from feeling it or to get rid of it when it catches me by surprise.

Malcolm
 

Writing the world into a better place

A writer friend of mind is asking writers in her blog how we use our talents to lift up the world and make it a better and brighter place.

Am I under any obligation to do this? Or, to put it another way, is the ultimate intent of fiction the creation of a bully pulpit from which writers preach, persuade, editorialize and badger readers into changing their minds about one thing or another thing?

Joseph Campbell has said that our true focus as individuals is changing ourselves rather than trying to change the world. One can infer many things from his view, one of them being that as each of us becomes better, the world becomes better.

Blogs and social networking sites give writers and non-writers a chance to speak on behalf of their causes and to comment on the good, the bad and the ugly in the daily news. I'm likely to make positive comments online about advances in literacy, keeping the arts in the schools, saving the environment, etc. I say less about politics because the whole mess has become too polarized for sensible debate,

That said, am I--as a writer--supposed to be any more or any less of an advocate through my work on behalf of my causes and beliefs that those in other professions? Some schools of though say "yes," going so far as to say that fiction is bankrupt if it isn't overtly conveying the belief system of the political party, nation, religion or social/political organization(s) or group(s) to which the author belongs.

Novels, short stories and plays have often made very strong statements on behalf of the hungry, the oppressed, the misunderstood and the forgotten. But must they?

I don't think so.

However, in trying to make myself a better person, I am likely to write about the process. So, my fiction typically portrays individuals who discover ways to triumph over adversity and/or become more at one with themselves and the environment and the other creatures with whom we share the planet. Readers with similar views are likely to like what they see. When I read their work, I feel less alone with my beliefs, so perhaps they feel less alone when they read my books.

Readers who have strongly opposing views will probably continue to believe what they've always believed when they finish reading my books.

Perhaps my work positively influences a few fence sitters from time to time.

My writing has always been very personal. I always write what I care about. So my fiction is an extension of myself, reflecting my successes and my failures. But I try to avoid having overt agendas because I've always thought that people who try to set an example can easily become vain and inauthentic. Sooner or later they will lose themselves in their pretense.

Making the world a better place is rather a tall order for those of us who are still trying to figure out how to do the right thing and avoid doing the wrong thing. We all see each other struggling with becoming the best they can be, and there's a great deal of comfort in knowing others are seekers on the path and that from time to time, we can learn from their bad days and good days.

My fiction is rather like that, I think. Readers see the bad and the good in me and from time to time find notions they can adapt (or avoid adapting) for their own lives.

--Malcolm

Smoky Zeidel's Inspiration Series

Author Smoky Trudeau Zeidel ("The Cabin," "On the Choptank Shores") invited writers, artists and musicians to participate in a "what inspires you" series of posts that appear every Wednesday on her blog.

She kicked off the series on May 3 with Some Thoughts on Inspiration. "I’m often asked what inspires me to write the things I write. On the surface, that’s an easy question to answer. I’m inspired by nature in all its beautiful and not so beautiful forms, and I’m inspired by injustice toward all living beings."

Photographer and poet John Glaze contributed his thoughts on  May 9. "Inspiration isn’t something I generally look for, although I have at times, during an extremely dry spell, lain in the dark on my bed and said to the darkness, 'Inspire me.'"

My post The World of Wonder appeared today, May 16. "I’m addicted to wonder: my response to awe-inspiring places that epitomize the grace and grandeur of creation."

In the coming weeks, you'll hear from authors Patricia Damery, Melinda Clayton and Debra Brenegan, followed by musician Scott Zeidel, visual artists Kathi Anderson and Mara Lonner.

I hope you'll stop by and read an essay or two and let us know what inspires your art, writing, cooking, crafts and best afternoons in the park.

--Malcolm

The Beginnings of Heroes and Heroines

Sometimes heroic decisions are made in a split second. A wife risks her life to run into a burning house to rescue her husband or children. A student risks his life to pull a classmate out of the way of a bus.

I tend to think such decisions come more out of instinct than logic for the simple reason the circumstances seldom provide the prospective hero with the luxury of contemplating his or her options.

When interviewed by reporters afterwards, people routinely say, "I did what anybody would have done under similar circumstances." They might well be right.

When it comes to long-term decisions such as those symbolized by mythic journeys and lifetime causes and avocations, we usually don't have to decide to act or not act in almost zero time. This is a mixed blessing. Rather than simply acting, we mull over what our intuition is already telling us to do. The prospective consequences cause us a lot of soul searching as well as a lot of pain.

Since we have time to think about the consequences, we know we will judge ourselves--and also be judged by others--if we make a "bad" decision. Obviously, if a person dies while trying to save another, his or her family will live forever with that loss. Yet s/he will usually be given more slack in the decision than, say, an individual who pursues a dangerous cause on the far side of the world and never returns.

In both cases, the circumstances may be of equal importance. In fiction, as in life, we are expected to restrain our instincts for risky long-term ventures even though we are applauded for acting on impulse when the danger is immediate.

As the author of two hero's journey novels and one heroine's journey novel, I often ponder the thought processes that cause a hero or a heroine to act in both immediate and long-term dangerous situations. In fiction, the danger and the negative consequences become part of stories that make people buy exciting books. In life, similar consequences send people to psychologists.

Perhaps we read about heroes and heroines to convince us that we should take the risks and become heroes and heroines in our own lives.

-- Malcolm

My hero's journey novels are "The Sun Singer" and "Garden of Heaven: an Odyssey." My heroine's journey novel is "Sarabande."

You can learn more about them on my website. Stop by an visit!

Cool Writing Links for Friday, May 4

This morning's rain isn't helping me wake up and continue my planned work on a short story or on my website. So, with a cup of coffee, I've been reading on line. . .

• As a contemporary fantasy author, I was happy to get a review copy of Vandana Saxena's The Subversive Harry Potter. Stemming from a doctoral dissertation, the book looks at J. K. Rowling's popular series asking, among other things, whether the formulaic "hero - schoolboy - savior" theme and the huge marketing campaign co-opt the work. I take a brief look at it here.
• In her blog "The Labyrinth," author Midori Snyder writes about the feelings of mothers whose sons have been sent off to war. The title, "Two Powerful Warriors," comes from the Tolstoy quotation: "The two most powerful warriors are patience and time."
• The Google book-scan case continues to drag on while those of us who had our work illegally copied continue to sit out here with no resolution to the theft. Bloomberg reports in "Google Argues for Dismissal of Authors’ Book-Scan Lawsuit" that the company is arguing that the Authors Guild can't serve as a representative for the authors involved.
• Author Smoky Zeidel has begun a series of posts on her "Smoky Talks" blog about the things that inspire writers and authors with "Some Thoughts on Inspiration." I'll be among the authors and artists to contribute a guest post to this series in the upcoming weeks.
• Over on NPR, David Edelstein takes a look at "The Avengers," calling it a "A Marvel-Ous Whedonesque Ride."   
• Jonathan Gottschall looks at "Why fiction is good for you" in the Boston Globe - "Is fiction good for us? We spend huge chunks of our lives immersed in novels, films, TV shows, and other forms of fiction. Some see this as a positive thing, arguing that made-up stories cultivate our mental and moral development. But others have argued that fiction is mentally and ethically corrosive."
• Meanwhile, GalleyCat has posted a story with an impossible-to-resist headline: "Self-Published Author Lands Book Deal After 125 Years."

Best wishes for a great weekend filled with good reading and great writing.

Malcolm